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Spokesparents
Karen Berard-Reed - On Christmas Eve, 2011, my family visited the home of close friends. After dinner, the boys headed to the computer room to track Santa’s progress on the NORAD website. Minutes later, chaos erupted when my younger son ran, screaming, into the kitchen, bleeding profusely from the face. My husband was yelling, telling me Jonathan had been shot. These words were incomprehensible to me and I was certain he was confused.
It quickly became clear this was a horrifying truth. The boys had discovered a loaded pellet gun next to the computer. They mistakenly believed it was an accessory to a video game. With typical boy curiosity, they picked it up. My 9 year old son was holding it when it went off and my younger son was shot in the eye. We would later learn the pellet had traveled through his eye socket and lodged in the center of his brain. The pellet remains there, as an operation to remove it brings much higher risk than leaving it.
Jonathan made amazing progress since his week in the hospital. If you saw him today, you would see a typical, exuberant 6 year old. The physical consequences of the trauma are quiet and open-ended. He has weakness on his left side, he is at risk for seizures, and we are watching closely for any changes related to his learning, personality, and affect. The scariest risks are related to serious brain infection that could occur at any point in his life – or never.
Even with all of this, today I am more worried about my older son. He is devastated by this accident and that his beloved little brother is hurt. We have some serious emotional work to do with him to help him understand this was NOT his fault but rather that of an irresponsible adult.
While I would use a million wishes if I could erase this event from our lives, I know I cannot. I can only hope our story might help prevent further tragedy. Please consider the following advice and have a serious conversation with your children:
- NEVER, EVER leave ANY gun where a child can find it. Clearly, pellet and BB guns need to be treated the same as other types of firearms.
- NEVER leave a gun loaded.
- Tell your children to alert an adult as soon as they see a gun even if they believe it to be a toy or video game accessory. Make sure they know adults must be the ones to make this determination.
This advice may seem irrelevant to you if you do not have guns in your home. But, we do not either and the home in which our tragedy occurred is one where I never questioned my children’s safety. If I were able to turn back time, this would be the first conversation I would have with my boys.
Mylissa Bellamy - “I used to be a “normal” mom. I used to have a “normal” life. Then one day, everything changed. On January 22, 2010 our eleven-year-old son, Matthew, went home from school to spend the night with one of his best friends. 
Unknown to us, earlier in the week the little boy had gone hunting with his grandfather and brought a gun home with him. His mother did not realize it was real, which led to it being left unsecured. Within a few minutes of the boys’ arrival on the 22nd, Matthew’s friend showed him his gun. As he picked it up, it discharged. Matthew was shot by the one bullet left in that gun and he died in an ambulance on the way to the hospital.
There really are no words to adequately describe the heartache of losing a child. Matthew was a joyous child and his absence has left a void that will never be filled. However, as deep as our pain is, we didn’t want his death to be without reason. In our son’s memory, my husband, Chip, and I founded The Matthew Bellamy Project. The response has been tremendous. It’s not always easy to be so open about our loss and heartache, but we know it’s the right thing to do. We have to make it real so others will understand the importance of protecting children from firearms. I miss my son, every minute of every day. Losing Matthew has left a hole in my heart that will never be filled.
As you read this, I want to ask three things of you. First, if you have unsecured firearms in your home, please do not go to bed tonight until you have locked them up. There is nothing in your home that you need to protect that is more valuable than the life of a loved one. It is parents’ job to make sure their children are safe.
Secondly, before you allow your children to go into someone else’s home, you need to ask one simple question, “Do you have unsecured firearms in your home?” You may find it hard to do, but trust me, it’s one of the most important things you will ever do for your kids.
And third, I ask you to embrace and love your family, especially the children in your life. No one is guaranteed tomorrow. Cherish your family today.”
Sonya Barge – “I think about my life in two parts now – before the tragedy and after.
I was running just a little late from work to pick up my 3 year-old-son from his regular babysitter’s home outside St. Louis one June day in 1998. It was during those fateful minutes that the babysitter’s own 11-year-old child found a gun in a closet. My son Markie entered the room, startling the boy with the gun. The gun went off. He never meant to shoot Markie.
About six months before the tragedy, I can so vividly remember hearing a story on the evening news about a local mother who lost her son to an accidental shooting. Little did I know that one day the tragic news story would be about my son Markie, and that there may have been something I could have been doing all along to prevent it.
Today, I urge all parents to do everything they can to keep their children safe from guns and ask a simple question that can prevent accidental tragedies just like the one that has changed the rest of my life: “Is there a gun in the homes where my child plays?”
There’s no way to describe the anguish of losing a child and the effects of Markie’s death – not just on my family, but also on the family of the boy who shot my son. My hope is to prevent other families from experiencing the heartache we have gone through.
Seven years ago, my baby sitter’s son accidentally shot and killed my 3-year-old son Markie with an unlocked gun he found in a closet. I cannot stress this enough: had I asked, he might still be alive.”
Ge Wu - “I had been a proud mother of two until April 17, 2009, when my life, my dreams, and my pride were completely turned upside down. On that day, my 15 year old son Aaron, an honored student, a cellist, a talented tennis player, and above all, a generous and kind person with a big heart, took his own life. He used a gun that one of 
his friends had taken from his mother without her knowing.
I am certain that if my son did not have access to that gun, that if the child’s parents had known the danger of keeping an unsecured gun in their home, my Aaron would be alive today. When Aaron was having a moment of crisis, as so many teenagers do, access to that gun made all the difference.
I know there is nothing I can do now to bring Aaron back. I have to live with that every day. All I can hope to do now is to channel my grief and regrets into a passion to educate and inform so that I might prevent other mothers from knowing the same indescribable pain of losing a child.”
Jeanne Caroline - “The day that I had to kiss my beautiful son Seanne goodbye for the last time, I made a promise. A promise to him and all those who can no longer speak for themselves. To share the pain no parent should have to endure. To teach as many as who are willing to listen. To reach as many families as possible with
the tragedy that befell our family, and in doing so, save a child, our most precious gift in life.” On September 5, 2003 Jeanne Caroline’s world changed forever. Jeanne and her husband Sean lived in Largo, Florida with their son Seanne, a warm, bright and loving seventh grader who pitched for his Little League team and had already celebrated his first hole-in-one in golf. On that Friday, Jeanne was just sitting down to grilled cheese sandwiches and tomato soup with her sister, when she heard the news from a police officer at her door. Her son, Seanne had been unintentionally shot and killed at a friend’s house.
Today Jeanne is the president of the Seannes Wish Foundation. Since the terrible tragedy of losing her son, Jeanne has dedicated her life to educating others about the dangers of gun violence against children. Recognizing that guns are one of the least talked about and most misunderstood child safety topics and that unintentional shootings are 100% preventable, Jeanne is spreading the word and helping to prevent other tragedies. She has been featured in numerous newspaper articles and on news programs and has spoken to parents and children at schools and community organizations about her experiences.
Ann Marie Crowell – “Our 12-year-old son, Brian Crowell, was at a friend’s house on Dec. 2 4, 1997. They had spent the day together, shopping at the mall for Christmas gifts, and ended the day at this friend’s house playing video games. At 3:45pm, our daughter called her brother to tell him to come home so that they could get ready for our traditional Christmas Eve celebration held at our home with our friends and family. I was scheduled to get out of work at 4:00.
While Brian was on the phone, his friend decided to show him the gun that he had recently discovered in his mother’s room. This gun, we were told later, was in her possession for her own protection from an abusive ex-husband. He thought that he had removed all the bullets but one remained stuck in the barrel. He pulled back the hammer three times to hear the click, click, click. On the third click, the gun fired and hit Brian in the neck, just as he was hanging up the phone. His last words to his friend were “I can’t believe you shot me!” Brian attempted to run from the room to get home but he only made it as far as the living room where he collapsed on the floor.
Brian was quickly taken to the hospital and I received a call at work telling me that there had been an accident and I should come to the hospital. My husband also received the same call and we met at the emergency room where we were told of the severity of his condition. The bullet had entered through his neck and torn him apart right down his chest. Although the doctors attempted to do surgery, we were told there was nothing more they could do for him and we were allowed to be with him as he died.
We feel that we have been robbed. Brian robbed of his life, and we robbed of the happiness in watching our son grow up and do all the things we had hoped for our children: go to the prom, graduate high school, college, become productive adults and perhaps marry and have children of their own.”
James Philbert – “My name is James Philbert and I grew up and currently reside in Bedford Stuyvesant in Brooklyn, NY — sometimes known as “The Hood” or “The Ghetto.” I bear witness to many violent and fatal acts due to the use of guns.
I have lost way too many people in my neighborhood that I have known dearly. One person in particular was my good friend Quadeer Lee. Quadeer was a regular teenage African American kid who attended school on a regular basis. His life was taken by a 15-year-old rival, who had a beef with him. People knew what was going to happen. If just one person said something, it could have been different.
But now my friend is dead and the 15 year old murderer is still on the loose. Another young African American life is destroyed, and it could have been prevented.”
Celia McGinty – In September 2004, after an acquaintance told her that he planned a Columbine-like massacre at his school, Celia spoke up. The investigation that followed uncovered Nazi paraphernalia, stolen rifles, including an AK-47 assault rifle, bomb-making devices, hundreds of rounds of ammunition and hunting knives. Celia’s courage undoubtedly prevented a senseless tragedy and the loss of innocent lives.
Matt Atkinson – Matt Atkinson was a senior at Green Bay East High School in Wisconsin in 2006. Two of his friends were involved in a plan to attack his school. He found out about their plans and was faced with a difficult decision – tell on his friends or let a terrible tragedy occur at his school. He chose to speak up. Matt went to a staff member and told what he knew. Authorities later removed various guns, ammunition, bombs and suicide notes from one of his friends’ homes. Matt’s brave decision prevented terrible events from occurring at his school.
Crystal Woodman Miller – Crystal was a junior at Columbine High School in 1999, the year that two students opened fire on the school and killed twelve of her classmates and one teacher. She was in the library studying for a test when two boys rushed in with guns and she hid there under a table while they shot many people around her. Crystal survived because the attackers ran out of ammunition. The events of that day changed her life. Now twenty-four years old, Crystal travels around the country fulltime, telling her story at schools, community centers and churches. Crystal is committed to empowering young people and giving them tools to prevent similar tragedies in their own communities.
Kelly Vickery – Kelly’s friend told her that one of their classmates who they had known since middle school had brought a gun to school and had given it to someone else. Her friend tried to swear her to secrecy, but Kelly did not want her school to be “another Columbine” and decided to tell her mother. Together they went to the principal and the boys were taken in and the gun was confiscated. Though Kelly struggled with the decision and the fear of being ostracized, ultimately her sense of duty prevailed. Kelly prevented a potential tragedy.
Michelle Houde - Michelle and her best friend found out that a boy had photos and detailed sketches of an attack he was planning at school. They reported what they knew. It turned out the boy was going to attack the school early the next day. Michelle’s quick thinking saved countless lives.
